Enid Vs Elizabeth Smackdown Special: Sweet Valley High, Secrets Chapter 5

Posted on October 12, 2015 by


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Sweet Valley High: Secrets Chapter 5

Elizabeth had never seen her sister in such a good mood. Jessica was making her positively dizzy, flying around the room like a hyperactive bumblebee as she got ready to spend Saturday night out with Cara.

It truly is heart-warming to see a teenage girl who really know how to follow her bliss. Even if that bliss comes from wreaking havoc on the lives of everyone around her. Who knew ruining Ronnie and Enid’s relationship was the key to Jessica’s happiness.

Elizabeth politely asks Jessica where she’s off to, and Jessica tries to pique her interest by being withholding and mysterious. Uninterested in indulging Jessica, Elizabeth is like, “Cool, no fucks were given anyway.”

This of course immediately breaks Jessica’s spirt, and causes her to pressure Elizabeth to guess where she’s going. She really wants to be the center of her twin’s world. Elizabeth is the one person that has wormed her way into Jessica’s heart even though she’s always messing things up for her by ruining her reputation and any outside relationships Elizabeth tries to cultivate. Such a complicated relationship they have.

Elizabeth doesn’t cave to Jessica’s desires:

“OK. Let me see . . . you’ve been invited to a White House reception and your fairy godmother is getting ready to turn a zucchini from Mom’s garden into a jet.”

Jessica threw a hairbrush at her sister, missing her by several inches. “Very funny.” She was trying very hard not to laugh.

I feel like Elizabeth is really starting to come into her own. You know, telling jokes, impressing Jessica with her cool disinterest and good sense of humor.

“OK.” Elizabeth giggled. “I give up. Where are you going?”

“To a party at Lila’s. You could’ve been invited, too, if you tried a little harder to be friends with Lila.”

Elizabeth points out that she cares even less about being friends with Lila than she did about where Jessica was going tonight.

Elizabeth shrugged. “Why should I? I think she’s a phony.”

“No phonier than some of your friends,” Jessica shot back. “I won’t mention any names, but I think you know who I mean. Her first initial is E—and I’m not talking about E.T., either.”

Jessica, you are really losing your touch. I don’t think Elizabeth has even met E.T.

The girls continue to debate the finer points of Lila Fowler’s family, when Jessica reveals that Lila could be a cat dressed as a teenage girl for all she cares, Bruce Patman is going to be at the party, so she has to be there. I thought this book had just picked up right where the last one left off, but it seems like Jessica has really climbed the social ladder quite quickly between the books! She’s really among the elite now.

Elizabeth heads back to her room so Jessica can get ready in peace (AKA so she can try to preserve some of her sanity), and she realizes it’s been 24 hours since her double date with Enid. Enid still hasn’t returned any of her phone calls! Really! What could be going on with her? Elizabeth gives one last ring, and this time she gets through to a very angry Enid.

“You don’t sound all right. Aren’t you going to tell me what happened last night?”

Enid laughed, but it was a dry, harsh sound. “I’m surprised you have to ask, Liz. I should think it would be pretty obvious to you.”

“What are you talking about? Enid, hey, it’s me, Liz. What’s going on with you? Look, I’m sorry if I told you to level with Ronnie. Was he upset when you told him? Is that it?”

“Upset?” Enid choked. “Yeah, I’d say he was upset, all right. Only I wasn’t the one who told him.”

“So he knows about the police record. Big deal. He’ll get over it in a day or two. After all, it happened such a long time ago. It has nothing to do with you and Ronnie now.”

“He knows about the letters.” Elizabeth gasped. “How could he have found out? You and I were the only ones who knew!”

“That’s right,” Enid replied icily.

“Oh, Enid, you couldn’t possibly think—”

“What am I supposed to think?” Enid was crying now. “You tell me.”

Everyone is always so quick to turn on poor Elizabeth. At this point, how is Enid’s first thought not like, “JESSICA HAS THE HOUSE BUGGED!”

“Why should I believe you? You’re the only one who knew about those letters. The only one. I confided in you. It had to be you. Oh, Liz, how could you do this to me?”

That is so harsh. This friendship ending is hard to handle, especially because she’s not even giving Elizabeth a chance!

Jessica shows up, and for some reason Elizabeth tells her everything! I know she’s vulnerable, but this is a bad move.

Of course, this is everything Jessica ever wanted and more:

“It’s so unfair! How could she accuse you of such a thing? There must have been some mistake. Enid probably let it slip out about the letters herself, and now she wants to blame someone else. I always knew she was just using you, Lizzie. I saw right through her from the very beginning. You’re better off without her.”

It’s scaring me how much Jessica wants to isolate Elizabeth from everyone else, but then at the end of the chapter she just skips off to get ready for her party with her friends.

“Don’t you see? It’s the principle of the thing. How could he ever trust her again, knowing how she’d covered up the truth? Honestly, Liz, I think it’s better Ronnie did find out. Whoever told him about the letters was doing him a big favor.”

“But who?” cried Elizabeth. “Who would have done such a hideous thing?”

She looked up to ask Jessica’s opinion, but her twin was off again in a whirlwind of preparation for the party. Clearly, the subject was beginning to bore her.

Gee, yeah, who could have done such a hideous thing? Maybe the person who is always doing all the hideous things. I really think that there should be a Pretty Little Liars/Sweet Valley High crossover, because Jessica is definitely A.

text from A gif pretty little liars