Zoey Has A Plan That Makes Sense, So I’m Concerned: House of Night Untamed Chapter 16

Posted on January 15, 2016 by

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House of Night: Untamed Chapter 16

Zoey and Stevie Rae are finally reunited BFFs! Which means it’s time for them to slut-shame Aphrodite:

“Darius said he’d escort me and Aphrodite. She said she’d keep him busy so that we could talk.”
“Bet that’s a real hardship for her,” Stevie Rae said sarcastically.
“Please— we all know she’s kinda skanky,” I said.

Because even after Zoey spent book #3 getting to second, third-ish, and home base with three different guys, respectively, while Aphrodite hasn’t been involved with a single guy since she was turned down by one in the first book, this is still the only thing that Zoey and Stevie Rae have to talk about. So, character development in House of Night remains as existent as self-awareness.

Rather than explain why this risky secret meeting is even happening at all, the Casts continue to stall with hilarious jokes!

“what were you saying about some news?” I asked […]
“You will not believe it! Kenny Chesney is comin’ in concert to the new BOK Arena!”

*rereads notes* Wait, sorry, that’s actually “with the same joke – singular – that was already tired before it was the only line of dialogue a single character had for three straight books”. Again – character development! So pesky!

same as it ever was

“Fine,” she said. “But when I figure out how to get Internet access down in the tunnels so I can get tickets online, do not ask me to get one for you.”
I shook me head [sic] at her. “Computers? Down in the tunnels?”
“Nuns? At Street Cats?” she countered with.

How is everyone still losing their shit over this? Nuns doing charity is the least weird thing that has taken place in this series.

Zoey fills Stevie Rae in on Stark and Stark dying (that was fast!), and asks if she has any insight on if/when he’ll come back as an undead fledgling. Stevie Rae sadly explains that “back then, days didn’t mean anything to me”, but that the only thing she does remember is Neferet feeding her her blood. Which seems like the sort of important detail she should have given Zoey ASAP, but Zoey isn’t bothering to do anything about that whole “Neferet is evil” thing anyway, so whatever, I guess.

Zoey also fills Stevie Rae in on how she was starting to like like Stark. I wonder if even Stevie Rae is getting a little annoyed with Zoey’s weekly boy drama overhauls by this point.

the incredibles yes i know darling

Zoey explains that High High High Priestess (or whatever) Shekinah is at the House of Night now, called off Neferet’s human-vampyre war, and has asked her and the gang to perform a cleansing ceremony, which puts Aphrodite’s no-longer-a-vampyre status in considerable jeopardy. Then something absolutely crazy happens: Zoey realizes something that just last chapter I was wondering why she doesn’t just do at this point.

Just exactly what would be so wrong about Stevie Rae being found out? Not caught hiding and sneakily being part of a ritual, of course, but just found out.

Of course, this is House of Night – which is super super totally okay with gays and just can’t stand homophobia. So, naturally, this immediately becomes a gay joke.

“What if we didn’t hide you? What if we outed you instead?” “Zoey, I love Damien and all, but I’m really not gay.”

…this doesn’t even make sense. If Stevie Rae, a woman, falls in love with a gay guy, that doesn’t make her gay. This is the stupidest sentence I’ve ever written for the blog, and yet this is an actual flawed understanding in this book that I have to explain the problem with right now.

BUT BACK TO SERIOUSLY WHY DON’T THEY JUST REVEAL STEVIE RAE ALREADY.

When she finally spoke, her voice sounded choked. “But they can’t know about me.”
“Why not?” I asked calmly.
“Because if they find out about me, they’ll find out about the others.”
“So?”
“That would be bad,” she said.
“Why?”

squidward head slamming gif

Eventually they accept that this makes nothing but sense and we get on with our lives. Also the plot.

“[D]oesn’t it make sense that it’s bad that Neferet is the only adult vamp who knows about you guys?”

YEP. WE'RE THERE NOW.

YEP. WE’RE THERE NOW.

Stevie Rae is worried that something could go wrong, because the undead fledglings might not go over so well. Zoey insists that the timing couldn’t be better because the leader of all vampyres will be there for the reveal that Neferet is doing something terrible. Okay, if Zoey’s on board, something’s got to be wrong about this plan. What am I missing?

Stevie Rae reluctantly says she’ll think about Zoey’s plan. Zoey then fills Stevie Rae in on how Erik Night is her new drama teacher and that’s gonna be so awkward.

f'reals

f’reals

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