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Browsing All Posts filed under »Left Behind«

The Antichrist Mind-Controls Everyone, This Is No Fun Anymore: Left Behind Chapter 25, Part 2

March 29, 2016 by

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Previously in the last chapter of Left Behind, the antichrist has “Who me? Aw, shucks”-ed his way to a brand new political office in charge of the entire world. Despite devoting considerably more of its almost 500 pages to an intricate political thriller narrative than to, you know, the apocalpyse, it is not particularly clear how […]

S**t Gets Real, Book Manages to Remain Really Boring: Left Behind Chapter 25, Part 1

March 28, 2016 by

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Left Behind Chapter 25, Part 1: Carpathia gathers his nearest and dearest to show off his favourite party trick – addressing people (or countries) one by one and saying the same thing in just a slightly different way. Only this time there’s a twist! He uses this rare and beautiful talent to fuck with some people’s […]

No One Is Sure Who The Antichrist Is For A Chapter: Left Behind Chapter 24

March 22, 2016 by

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It’s the second-last week of Left Behind! Guess how many times I’ve mistyped “Buck” as “Fuck” the last three months. Left Behind: Chapter 24 The penultimate chapter of this book about the rapture begins with its world-renowned journalist main character Buck “getting a head start on his article on the theory behind the disappeareances”, which happened […]

TRIBULATION FORCE, ASSEMBLE!: Left Behind Chapter 23

March 21, 2016 by

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Buck heads to Chicago to find a replacement for Lucinda Washington where he immediately finds the perfect candidate: News of his becoming their boss had swept the place, and he was greeted with coolness by Lucinda Washington’s former assistant, a young woman in sensible shoes. She told him in no uncertain terms, “Plank did nothing about […]

Buck Is The Answer To Chloe’s Actual F***ing Prayers: Left Behind Chapter 22

March 15, 2016 by

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We’re getting pretty close to the end of the first Left Behind, which is a series that apparently have like four hundred books in it. We’re not interested in reading all that. Ariel and I have been talking and making, but we’re curious what our readers want. Leave a comment if you have more to say […]

Buck Can’t Tell Rayford How He Feels: Left Behind Chapter 21

March 14, 2016 by

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It’s the moment we’ve all be waiting for. Buck interviewing Rayford. This is the moment everything in this story has been leading up to. Buck was glad for the opportunity to interview Rayford Steele, but his emotions were mixed. The reactions of the captain who had piloted the plane on which he had been a […]

Buck and Chloe Sitting in a Tree: Left Behind Chapter 20

March 8, 2016 by

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T-A-L-K-I-N-G. What? Did you think I was suggesting they hook up in this chapter? In this book? Goodness. Leave room for Jesus. Left Behind: Chapter 20 Rayford and Chloe arrive at the hotel that Buck and Hattie are at, hopefully finally tying these two increasingly disparate stories into a sensible whole. Although “sensible” doesn’t really seem to […]

I Think I Understand Roughly 5% of the Plot: Left Behind Chapter 19

March 7, 2016 by

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Left Behind Chapter 19: Rayford is still stressed that he might not be able to convince Chloe to accept Christ. He doesn’t want to be annoying, but he really really wants to save her. I’m starting to feel a little bad for how exasperated I feel when Jehova’s Witnesses somehow get into my apartment building and urgently […]

I Guess Steve’s A Bad Guy Now: Left Behind Chapter 18

March 1, 2016 by

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Left Behind: Chapter 18 Left Behind accidentally sums up its recent events a little too well. “Did you hear about those kooks at the Wailing Wall?” Steven said. “Like I’m interested in that right now,” Buck said. It’s like even Left Behind is having a hard time caring about the events of Left Behind. Buck and Steve […]

Carpathia is Definitely Not the Antichrist, Wink Wink: Left Behind Chapter 17

February 29, 2016 by

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Left Behind Chapter 17 Rayford and Chloe continue to be sad. Chloe hints that she’s thisclose to accepting Christ, and I find it very hard to get behind her “journey” given 1) Chloe’s decision is all from Rayford’s perspective 2) This book is this book. 3) We already know what the right choice is in this […]